Assalamualaikum,
Nak baca senyum-senyum. (:
Stop Searching for a Prince
Nowadays, there is a trend on Facebook/Twitter/blog/tumblr where
people would talk about marriage; demanding a great, soleh husband/wife
to enter the Jannah together and so on.
Looking at a positive side, I can't deny that it is good for us to
have a perspective that a relationship between a man and a woman is a
thousand way better with marriage - as all of us (Muslims) get the fact
that marriage has more barakah and is a halal way to express love.
Furthermore, a successful marriage is a door to Jannah. I find that
it is beautiful when it is said that if a woman is a man's key to
paradise (by helping him to fulfill his deen with her through marriage
and being an obedient wife), so, a man is a woman's door to Jannah. The
key that opens the door - a husband and a wife need each other's help to
get there, masya-Allah.
The Prophet Muhammad SAW said: ''The most perfect believer in faith
is the one whose character is finest and who is kindest to his wife.''
(Tirmidhi and Nasa'i)
As a Muslim woman, I also want a great man to marry me - the man who
lowers his gaze so that I become the only woman he sees, the man who
preserved his heart for me, the man whose love will make me stronger - a
gift from Allah, insya-Allah. Surely, I want him to encourage me to be
closer to Allah in our baitul muslim; baitul dakwah.
But sisters, do you think that a prince of deen will marry you while
you just sit in front of your laptop, busy updating your status about
marrying a righteous man or sharing almost all of Irma Hasmie's marriage
photos and saying how lucky she is to become a wife of a great man?
Will a prince of deen look for you just because of your splendid poem
about marriage, your 'surat-buat-calon-suami' entries or your
'menanti-bakal-imamku-dunia-akhirat' status? No.
And why do you focus on finding a righteous man (a prince of deen)
only? Stop it. Don't let your imagination ruin yourself. There are many
doors of Jannah so there are many ways to enter them. Don't just focus
on one way (marriage). Be a righteous person first, prepare yourself.
Devote yourself to Allah and when you stop searching for a prince and
make Allah the King of your heart, He will help you to complete your
fairy tale.
"I tell the boys and girls; Allah has already written the name of
your spouses for you. What you need to work on is your relationship with
Allah. He will send him/her to you when you're ready. It is only a
matter of time." - Sheikh Mamdouh
For ladies, remember this - don't worry if you haven't found your
life partner. Be a righteous woman not just because you want to marry a
righteous man. Marry a righteous man not just because you want him to go
with you to Jannah. You can attain Jannah with or without marriage. Now
is the time for you be the one that can lead yourself there.
Take Maryam RA as an example. She never did get married but was still a righteous woman in the eye of Allah SWT. He says:
"And (the
example of) Mary, the daughter of 'Imran, who guarded her chastity, so
we blew into (her garment) through Our Angel, and she believed in the
words of her Lord and His scriptures and was the devoutly obedient."
(Surah at-Tahrim, verse 12)
Pray and make du'a for the best, not just for life in dunya but also
for hereafter. Ask Allah to forgive our sins, our parents' sins, our
family's, teachers' and friends'. Don't forget to make du'a for our
brothers and sisters in Palestine, Iraq, Syria, Afghanistan and Burma
after every prayer.
And ask Allah to help ourselves to be among the righteous men.
Renung-renungkan dan selamat beramal uols.
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